This is the 15th song in the Key of Awesome series.

Description Edit

Taylor Swift is reaching out to a broader audience! After the success of her song "Fifteen" she uses her vast knowledge of the human condition to capture what its like to be a middle aged man.

Lyrics Edit


You walk into the office and pull yourself together

For a meeting with your a-hole boss

He tells you that you're fired, but he calls it retired

He says "Sorry but we've gotta cut costs"

You start screaming like a fool

You trash your cubicle

And they have to call security

You see a hot girl by the curb 

And you try to flirt with her

But she thinks you need help crossing the street

When you're fifty 

Sometimes you drink till you pass out on the floor

Now your livers destroyed and you've got hemorrhoids

And you can barely get it up anymore


Aww come on, that only happened once! Shut up, Taylor Swift 



Your kids think you're lame and they cant hide their shame

When you're with them in a public place

And your wife can hardly stand you

She always reprimands you

And your son calls you a douchebag to your face

And then you've finally had enough

You say, "Son you think you're tough? You think that you can whoop your dad?"

Hes says, "No I'd rather not."

You say, "Gimme your best shot."

And then he kicks you in the nads

When you're fifty


Hey shut up! I'll sing a verse of your stupid song

You've got squinty little eyes, and you sound crappy live

Kanye was drunk but he wasnt wrong

And you sucked on the Grammy's 

Aww, come on. Don't cry, I'm sorry. I'm just going through a rough time. That was uncalled for. You're very talented. 

Oh god! Ahhhh! Somebody get me the hell out of this enchanted forest!